We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.
We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.
The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground
here.
RALPH NADER
The chicken's habitat on the original side of the
road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken
did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because
it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.
RUSH LIMBAUGH
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was
getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is
already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the
road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real
Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when
I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government
took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.
JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious?
Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken
was going to the "other side." That's what they call it-the other side.
Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will
become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens 'til we sort out this
abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless
phrases like "the other side."
DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed, I've not been told!
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain. Alone.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.
GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the
road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was
good enough for us.
BARBARA WALTERS
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the
chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it
experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its
life-long dream of crossing the road.
JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.
ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
KARL MARX
It was a historical inevitability.
SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified
in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
VOLTAIRE
I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I
will defend to the death its right to do it.
CAPTAIN KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens
have to cross before you believe it?
SIGMUND FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken
crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your
checkbook-and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
MARTHA STEWART
No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I
had a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price
dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.
ALBERT EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the
chicken?
BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by
chicken? Could you define chicken, please?
THE BIBLE
And God came down from the heavens, and He said
unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed.
